And sometimes it's not. This is one of those times. For the last 6 weeks or so, I've been dealing with joint pain. Traveling joint pain. It started off in my right shoulder, then my left wrist started. This was at the end of April. Then, last week, my left shoulder starts to ache. Then my right wrist. But as my wrist throbs, the shoulder quits hurting the next day. But by the end of the day, my left wrist is hurting so bad that I ended up sitting up all night long in pain. Nothing I had here helped the pain at all. By 7:30 am, I'm waking the man and boy up and having them take me to the hospital. After 30 seconds of the doctor squeezing my wrist, 2 minutes worth of x-rays, and 2 hours of waiting in an exam room alone, the nurse comes in, gives me a prescription for a mild pain killer (slightly stronger than Tylenol, but not much), and tells me, "Perhaps you sprained it. Go home, elevate the arm and put ice on it. If it gets worse, call this doctor." So, I go, get the meds, and go home. Two hours later, my whole arm is swollen past the elbow, I can't put it down on a pillow to elevate it, and NOTHING can touch it without pure and absolutely strong agony. Childbirth was easier to deal with. At least I knew that the pain would end at some point then. This time, I wasn't too sure about that.
So I end up at a doctor's office. Not the one the hospital recommended, since it's Friday morning at 11 am, and they can't see me until Monday after 1 pm. I'm in agony, and you want me to wait HOW LONG??? So I go to the Urgent Care Center. Pay my co-pay, so in and talk to the PA. SHE actually listened to me! She knew that I didn't strain anything! They took blood and said that they were going to test me for rheumatoid inflammation, and make sure that it wasn't lupus, or something like that. Then she gave me anti-inflammatory meds, and stronger pain killers so that I could at least sleep for a couple of hours (at this time, I'd been looking at 36 hours with NO sleep--I was not functioning very well). So I go home and take more meds.
Friday was suppose to be D&D day. I was suppose to restart my game that I'm DMing. However, it helps if I'm coherent (or at least as coherent as I normally am!). So we didn't play.
This weekend was better. The pain was still there, but bareable. Monday, the boy is taking a break from his schoolwork and he comes in to me and says, "There's something under your car. It looks kinda like Julie (one of our cats, the gray tabby one), but it has a funny looking face and is making a funny noise." Now I'm thinking, "What?" The boy's 8, he's not stupid, so what is he talking about? Looks like a cat, but has a funny face and makes weird noises? So I go out and look. As I go down the stairs to the carport, a little puppy comes out and starts growling at me. So I just go back up the stairs and tell him, "Yes there is something there, and it barks." Then we hear a whining sound. I look out, and there are 2, count them, TWO puppies. Under my car. In the carport. They are lab puppies. And there are no neighbors with puppies. Where did they come from?
Anyway, I went and got the old cat cage, put them on the front porch, and then proceeded to make sure that none of the neighbors have missing puppies (nope). So I go and get some puppy chow and water for them. They look to be about 3 months old, and are really adorable. They're both girls. I call the man at work and tell him, "We have puppies!" "What? We don't have a dog! How do we have puppies?" So I explained it to him. When he gets home, he tells me that at least one person at work will take one of them. So now, we're thinking about keeping one and giving one away. We're keeping Jenny, the slightly larger female that is a lot more mellow than the smaller, hyper one. The smaller one we are calling SPAZ. Spaz's new mommy likes that name, and has already gotten a collar for her and everything.
Now I'm checking out spaying centers, and shots, etc. And I get my results back from my blood test. I am positive for "rheumatoid inflammation of the arthritis type." Which sounds like to me that I have Rheumatoid Arthritis, or RA. I remember my mom having it, suffering for many years because of it. But she never wanted to go to the doctor either. She only went toward the end, after her first radiation treatment for lung cancer. So she had symptoms for at least 15 years before that. So starting around age 44. I'm 33. And thinking back the last 5-6 years or so, I've probably had symptoms that I've dismissed or that couldn't be proved. That sucks. The last couple of days have been horrible, with the fact that I can barely do anything. But if I don't do anything, I actually get stiffer and hurt more. Vicious cycle time. I'm waiting on the referrel to a Rheumatologist (spelling?) where hopefully it won't take years to get this under management. I really don't know how Mom put up with this for so long, without doing something about it. I WILL NOT LIVE LIKE THAT! I can't. I have so much to do yet, and I refuse to lie down and allow this to cripple me. There are things that are going to have to change some. Thoughts and ideas, any way. Like the boy will be an only child now. Even if I dared to get pregnant on all the strong meds that I will probably be taking, I can't guarantee that I could even take care of a baby. There are moments now that make it difficult to do what is normally the most simpliest stuff (and the least thought of--like picking up a glass and drinking out of it!). So that avenue in my life is gone. And it's really difficult, because I've always wanted a little girl. Don't get me wrong, I love the boy to death, but I always wanted two children, one of each. Now, the only girls I'll have are the cats and Jenny.
For now, I have to try and keep my spirits up, keep moving, and just manage daily functions. Until this afternoon, I was still able to crochet. But then I took a nap, and stiffened up. But so far, knock on wood, I'm able to manage a little bit. It aches, but if I don't, the fingers stiffen up completely and start to curl up. So, until a doctor or therapist tells me otherwise, I will keep up my yarn obsessions and my D&D obsessions. And we will take everything one day at a time. And maybe I'll be able to get onto my blog to post (since I went through and actually read the troubleshooting section) and post more often. Instead of being an organization process (which has fallen down), this will be the process of trying to live and cope with RA, crocheting, knitting, sewing, D&D, and homeschooling. (I'm so eclectic!)
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